Are you getting lost in your relationships?
Have you found yourself sacrificing your wants and needs for others, to the point that it negatively impacts your life?
Are you in a relationship with someone that has a problem with alcohol or drugs?
Do your moods get strongly affected by the emotional state of people around you?
Is conflict something you avoid as much as possible?
Would you be considered a perfectionist?
If you answered “yes” to some or all of these questions, it’s possible that you are codependent. You’re probably feeling overwhelmed, drained, and resentful. Codependency takes a tremendous toll, emotionally, mentally, and physically. In many ways, someone who struggles with codependency is like a person carrying two backpacks - their own, and then someone else’s - it gets pretty heavy, and it’s hard to keep track of everything. If you’re looking for help, you’re in the right place - one of my specialties is helping people just like you to find happiness, improve their relationships, and find balance.
You didn’t cause it - but we can do something about it
Often, people who struggle with codependency experienced a difficult home environment growing up. There may have been substance abuse, neglect, or significant relationship problems. In that world, you learned a different set of rules that impact you in your adult relationships and set you up to have the difficulties you’ve been experiencing. There’s nothing wrong with you - you’ve just learned rules that don’t work in the rest of the world. I understand - I experienced some similar challenges in my childhood, and that led to some real problems in relationships and finding balance and happiness in my life.
In counseling, you’ll learn how to recognize the behavior patterns that leave you overwhelmed, hurt, and upset. I’ll teach you how to spot an unhealthy relationship, how to build a healthy one, how to set and hold effective boundaries in your relationships, and how to balance your needs with the needs of other important people in your life. This can help you improve your self-esteem, have happier relationships, and to find more time and energy for yourself.
It’s not about being selfish
The concept of codependency does have it’s critics, and some feel that the codependency ‘movement’ has done a lot of damage to marriages. When I work with someone on recovering from their codependency, the goal isn’t to teach them to be selfish and independent. The goal is to help them be interdependent. A key to having a healthy, happy life and relationships is balancing your needs and the needs of others. There are times when it’s appropriate to sacrifice your wants and needs for others - the problem occurs when it’s the choice that you always or nearly always make.
It’s time to take care of you
If you’re ready to stop the chaos, take back your life, and find balance, then get in touch and let’s get started. Or, if you have any questions, I’d also be happy to provide a confidential consultation via telephone or e-mail at no cost to you. I usually see my clients for one 45-50 minute session per week, but if a different schedule works better for you, that’s ok, too - we’ll put together a plan that meets your needs. Call today - let’s get your life back.
